I remember flying down the isle to see Return of the Jedi. I remember rocking Leia buns on the daily and playing Star Wars all the time. If you would have told little me that one day I would text my dad the trailer for a new Star Wars – a REAL new Star Wars that would make me feel like I was running down that isle in anticipation of Return of the Jedi starting again, I would never have believed you.

But, I so just did.

A Wookiee will forever be my co-pilot and I will always be a Rebel Girl. And now my two favorites are coming home. ‪#‎happyrebelgirl‬

And so are we.

We are now home from our annual Easter brunch at my parent’s house. The monkey’s fave Easter basket item? Yoda kites. I popped our dinner in the oven and the girls began to argue which Star Wars movie we are going to watch.

I should prelude this with the fact that they are 5 & 6 now but have been Star Wars fans since they were 2 & 3. I should also mention that as soon as we got home, lilest stripped off the dress so her half of the debate was argued wearing only her underwear.

I love my little geeklings and am frequently in awe of them when they get in uber geek mode. Fighting they do frequently. They flat out throw down like boys. Then two minutes later are smooching on each other and cooing about how they are bestest friends ever. But, every once in a while an actual debate occurs. Tonight is one of those nights.

For some reason, Revenge of the Sith has always been one of eldest’s favorites. Which doesn’t make any sense to me. She LOVES Anakin. Before it sunk in that it wasn’t really possible, she vowed to one day marry him. You’d think that Attack of the Clones would be her favorite then. Why the one where he turns to the dark side and gets his ass handed to him by Obi Wan? Yet it is. It also happens to be my least favorite of all of them. I understand it is necessary, but it’s all so sad. In fact, given that she is inherited my upset at movies that make me sad and habit of turning them off if they make me cry, I would think she would also find this the least favorite. But, whatever the reason, it’s her go to when we talk the new movies vs the classics.

Lilest is a girl after my own heart. She’s all about the classics. Of them, Return of the Jedi is frequently the one that she pushes for. She also HATES Revenge of the Sith.

And so the debate began.

Eldest declares her choice of Revenge of the Sith. Lilest shoots her down. Her argument is simple- it’s too dark, too scary, too sad. Eldest counters with the necessity of it in the total story line and then busts out comparing it to the story of Easter- Anakin dies. He is resurrected as Vader. Lilest throws her a complete curve ball with Return of the Jedi being much more Easter-like because Vader dies and Anakin is resurrected and redeemed. Eldest counters that Anakin flat out dies then, therefore it is not a story of resurrection. Lilest counters with the fact that Revenge of the Sith ends with Vader being created, but ends with that. There is no “character development of him at that point.” Eldest replies “well played, but Anakin still dies in Jedi.” Lilest “Oh really? Because I’m fairly certain that those that are strong with the Force never truly die and he does appear at the closing of the movie along with Obi Wan and Yoda.” Eldest’s retort? “That’s it, there is only one way to solve this- to the light sabers!”

So which one are we watching?

The Princess Bride.

Yup, they decided that fighting wasn’t the answer, it’s Spring Break so we should just pull a full on Star Wars marathon from start to finish instead.

I can hang with that.

It started with a tweet from @shimmer418. A little thing called #BoobieWed. What is #BoobieWed? It’s a group of women that have made it a mission to raise breast cancer awareness across Twitter, Facebook and Myspace by reminding men and women to self examine. Every Wednesday a sea of supporters change their avatars to show their support. Having lost my aunt Carol, my first official partner in crime, to breast cancer, this hit home. Early detection may have saved her life.

That one tweet led to a cathartic post. A declaration “Yup, I’ve Got Boobies.” And ultimately, my polka dotted bra clad breasts went up on Twitter for my little group of followers to see. The reaction was mixed to say the least. But, as soon as that post went up, my awesome tribe of geek girls responded with an outpouring of love and support that went beyond just RT’s. That’s how we roll. One makes a stand, we stand behind her.

We come in all shapes and sizes, each one of them gorgeous in their own right. We cover every spectrum you could declare geeky and we do it proudly.

We are strong. We are geek. We have boobies. We use our powers for good.

And I am so proud to announce that we have banded together to create a project for the cause.

Announcing The #BoobieWed Epic Geek Girls Edition Calendar!

Complete With:
Over a year’s worth of awesome women proudly displaying their geek and their girlie.
Monthly reminders to self examine
Major (and not so major) Con dates printed right on it

Featuring:
Amy Ratcliffe
Carie Small
Chelsie Tinordi
Geek Girl Diva
Jennie Zells
Jessie Gurd
Kara Evans
Katie Doyle
Kristin Reilly– Geek Girls Network
Lisa Manglass
Maria Palafox
Natali Heuss– Uber Dork Cafe
Nicole Wakelin
Ruth LoveCraft

Why This Calendar is so Important and What Your Purchase Means:

There are more than 250,000 women living in this country that were diagnosed with breast cancer under that age of 40. That does not account for the thousands that did not detect it early enough and lost their battles with breast cancer as a result.

The strongest weapon in beating breast cancer is early detection. That is the fuel behind this project- driving home the importance of it and reminding women (and yes men) to check their breasts regularly and remind those in their life to do so as well.

A portion of the proceeds of all Calendar sales will go to the following organizations:

The Young Survival Coalition: YSC works with survivors, caregivers and the medical, research, advocacy and legislative communities to increase the quality and quantity of life for women diagnosed with breast cancer ages 40 and under.

Feel Your Boobies: FYB is a breast cancer non-profit organization whose mission is to create an annual reminder campaign that utilizes unexpected and unconventional methods to remind young women to “feel their boobies”.

Remember #BoobiesAreStrongerThanTheForce But they still need to be checked.

Ready to purchase your copies? Click here!

Give the Epic Gift That Keeps On Giving.

For this last week and a half or so I have been pretty sick. After finally getting antibiotics for it, I ended up breaking out in hives from head to toe from them. My hives had hives. Soooo not attractive. Soooo not comfortable. I had hit the brick wall of burnt out.

Until last night.

I’m still wiped and still dealing with health issues, but it’s time to pick up the #truthbat again. This time, surprisingly, for the cafe. For everyone that believes in it.

You see, I have a weekly conference call every Tuesday night for the UberDork Cafe. I look forward to them for many reasons. What I learned last night floored me. Saddened me. When the shock of it all wore off, it downright pissed me off.

I’ve always proudly embraced the titles geek, nerd, dork. One of the many amazing lessons that I have learned on this incredible journey of UberDork Cafe is that us gnorks still tend to hide who we are. Stay in our lil corners of the online world and don’t tend to venture beyond that. Part of the whole goal of the cafe has been to give us a place to go to. To branch out from those corners. To give our future gnorks a place to go to meet others and to actually be able to comfortably be themselves in a place within the community, the real life community. To teach them and us that we don’t need to hide who we are. There is no shame in being geeks, nerds, dorks.

Last night I realized I might be wrong.

It might not be a fluke that there is nothing really like the UberDork Cafe out there. The fact that we tend to hide may not really be our fault. It seems others are more comfortable when we are contained to online. We may come out if we must, but we shall not refer to ourselves as dorks, or geeks or nerds. It makes others uncomfortable it seems.

Last night I was informed that major corporate sponsors of the first auction completely backed out. Why? Well, during initial contact the full name UberDork Cafe was used. From that point on it was shortened to UDC or “the cafe.” Then they got the press kit yesterday. These major corporations then stated that I would need to change the name of the cafe for them to follow through with sponsoring. Yup. They don’t like “dork.” And yeah, don’t try to replace it with nerd or geek either. Those simply won’t do as well. One of these major corporations makes a great deal of money off of us gnorks as well.

My response? (Ok, well the edited version, I won’t lie, there was A LOT of cussing on my behalf initially.)

Dear Giant Corporate People,

Shame on you. Shame on you for so very many reasons. For thinking you could just buy a name. For thinking you have that sort of power over people still. For thinking that us dorks, us nerds, us geeks are that weak that we would hide who we are, change who we are to suit your comfort. For being more than willing to take our money as long as we remain safely tucked away from view and deny who we are. For thinking that you somehow own us. For thinking that in this day and age discrimination is ok, as long as it has a price tag on it. For thinking that I am the type of person that is going to just roll over, change my entire character and teach my children that it is acceptable to allow a company, or even a person, to force you to change your name, your character, or who you are for them.

Allow me to enlighten you. Dork, nerd, geek… in your feeble minds may be words that show weakness or less than desirable characteristics. I hate to break this to you, but the term “corporate” invokes far worse feelings amongst a vastly wider population of people. People that span all age levels, races, income brackets, you name it. Do you know why that is? Because of things like this. Because you still live under the antiquated notion that bigger is always better. That money will buy you anything, anyone. I hate to break it to you, but it really doesn’t. In fact, it won’t even buy you one lil ole dork.

I’m not for sale. My children’s dream is not for sale. My friends, my family, the people that support this dream, that support the UberDork Cafe are not for sale.

And we certainly aren’t going anywhere. If anything, you’ve just made us a bit louder. A bit more present.

Thanks so much for reinforcing the need for the UberDork Cafe. Your shameful behavior has made my mission that much stronger.

Have a wonderful day!

Sincerely,
Natali
Proudly known as UberDork Girlie

It’s been almost a year now since I have written my “Yup, I’ve Got Boobies” post. To date it is the scariest, most emotional post I’ve ever written. Yes, even more so than the one outlining me standing there with a knife in my hand staring a stalker through my patio door. Breast cancer is far scarier than any stalker.

As soon as that post went up, my awesome tribe of geek girls responded with an outpouring of love and support that went beyond just RT’s. That’s how we roll. One laughs, we all laugh. One cries, we cry too- then whip out whatever we can to make that turn to laughter. One makes a stand, we stand behind her.

We are strong. We are geek. We have boobies. We use our powers for good.

And I am so proud to announce that we have banded together to create a project for the cause. Coming your way soon…

The #BoobieWed Geek Girls Edition Calendar

There are more than 250,000 women living in this country that were diagnosed with breast cancer under that age of 40. That does not account for the thousands that did not detect it early enough and lost their battles with breast cancer as a result.

The strongest weapon in beating breast cancer is early detection. That is the fuel behind this project- driving home the importance of it and reminding women (and yes men) to check their breasts regularly and remind those in their life to do so as well.

For more information please visit the amazing organization Young Survival Coalition.

And stay tuned for more to come on the Epic Gift That Keeps On Giving.

Now go give ’em a squeeze and make sure they’re happy!!!

Remember #BoobiesAreStrongerThanTheForce But they still need to be checked.

These last two weeks have been insanely busy, mostly in a really good way. As a result of juggling it all, I have been kind of missing in action online and for that I am truly sorry. I have really missed it too. So what the heck have I been up to??

Well… I found a place, though I’m still working on making it a signed, done deal. I’ve been doing some interviews with some amazing people that it still floors me would want to interview me and I’ve been working on the major announcement that will be made late Friday night. That announcement will include the next phase for UberDork Cafe. Oh! And I’ve been making and sending out my Woookiee Cookies now that they are available via the web site.

The Kickstarter page is now down to HOURS. They don’t even mark it in days at this point. With 51 hours to go (though it will most likely be 50 by the time I get this done, proof it neurotically a zillion times and post it) and 108 BEYOND AWESOME backers, the total sits at $6,480. I can’t begin to tell you how that number makes me feel. How all those numbers make me feel. To know that so many people support this, support me so much still gets me teary. My goal for the next 51(ish) hours is to get the word out as much as I can. The higher we get that number, the quicker this all goes. I’m not going to lie, I wish I was opening doors tomorrow. That I had the Wall of Love done and up and huggable. That I had each and everyone of you ready to walk in the door and share the big moment with me when it’s all 100% real.

This past weekend I made the trip down to Indy for Gen Con. I ended up leaving late Friday night and driving straight through. I was exhausted when I arrived, but giddy. The whole way down I had music people had suggested and one whole CD @dirty_saint made me. I LOVE Mixed Tapes! So, I didn’t feel even remotely alone on the trip. Then, I had @CapSteveRogers call to check on me right when I had to detour because some crazy lil Hwy 912 was closed. I was literally sitting on a dead end road by some railroad tracks wonderin where the heck I was when my phone rang. He navigated me back on a new route in no time. Our fearless @ThePowerGeeks host @DarthMolen also made me promise to call if I started getting sleepy and he’d talk to me the whole way there. Of course, by talking, he means picking on…but it’s the thought.

Saturday morning, I arrived and went to check in and get my press pass (THANK YOU @ThePowerGeeks!!). Before doing so, I started to fulfill my mission- I got to FINALLY actually huggle @NicoleWakelin! Into the press room we went! After hitting the press table for goodies, I turned around and @CapSteveRogers and @PeacockPub (who had ventured in with me) were sitting there with “O EM GEE” looks on their faces. Yup, sitting like two seats away was @FeliciaDay. Epicness already!! Right after that, I got to huggle the mess outta @KatieDoyle again and on to complete my mission. Whipping through the giant exhibit hall filled with so much awesomeness, I had but one goal.. to make it to the @G33kMade booth. When I did, I finally got to huggle my girls @GeekSoap and @KyleeLane. Whatever happened at that point during the weekend would be the proverbial icing on the cupcake. I can’t begin to tell you how much I love my sisters. Yeah, I called them sisters cuz it’s that deep.

Saturday morning was spent walking around with my peeps. Spending actual real life time with them and it was just as if we’d known each other forever. Exhausted, we made our way back to the G33k Made booth and I froze. Standing there before it was Wil Wheaton. With a ridonkilously huge grin on his face as well. I slipped on over and just started taking pictures. @wilw literally hung out there for quite a while. My favorite part of the whole entire weekend was listening to him talk to Lesley (the gorgeousness behind Geek Soap) and Kylee (the gorgeousness behind Luxury Lane Soaps). And then it happened. I swear Wil was gushing. He explained to Lesley and Kylee how amazing they were, how original and creative and refreshing Geek Made is. Then he told them how very proud he was of them. Wil, my dear, I have to say I agree with every single word that came out of your mouth. Lesley, Kylee and all the people they feature on G33kMade are what UberDork Cafe is about. SUPPORTING OUR GEEK COMMUNITY!! The things that can be accomplished when we team up! Well awesomesauce is just weak. We’re gonna have to invent a new word. I really need to state that Lucas, Lesley’s husband and Rory, Kylee’s husband freakin also rock in their own rights. Kick ass geek guys supporting the mess outta their gals is a beautiful, beautiful thing.

Later that day, Katie and I made our way through the parade of Cos Players (huge props to all of them!!) and back to the press room to sit and charge phones. There was some chef guy doing an interview with someone from Gen Con. It took everything in me not to stand up and scream “WTF!?!??!” In the short 10 min interview I heard some insanely horrible stereotypes come out of his mouth. “Ya know, at least the board game people have to get out and be social, not like those video gamers that sit locked in their houses by themselves playing their games all day and night.” SERIOUSLY??? “Well, I’ve seen some actual females here so maybe this generation of girls will start to break into this whole gaming thing.” WHAT!?!?!?! Some????? Start??? As painful as it was to listen to, it was a much needed dose of reality.

It drives home how important G33k Made is. How important UberDork Cafe is. How important WE ALL ARE. We’re not some group of freaks to come gawk at. We are a ginormous ball of freakin’ amazingness that, well if they don’t get it, they can kiss my big ole lily white ghetto booty. We ALL have geek in us. We ALL have nerd in us. We ALL have dork in us. Whether we embrace it or not. Why mock those that do?

So, I say we show the chef dbag’s of the world a lil something. I say we show them our gnork. Show them our love for each other. Show them what we are capable of as a community. Show them that if they don’t support us, we are just fine. WE HAVE EACH OTHER TO SUPPORT US. We get it.

And UberDork Cafe will be our lil physical safe haven. Our place to hang, to game, to learn, to chillax. Our continual con. Open all year round and passes never sell out.

Yeah, I haz a BIG love for my family. My family of gorgeous geeks/nerds/dorks. And to pull out one of my lilest’s quotes from an older post of mine “Yo! I gots your love right here!!”

Show G33k Made some love HERE!

Show UberDork Cafe some love HERE!

Let’s keep this BIG love going!!

MWUAH!

P.S. Some more love ya can show…

The Power Geeks
Cap Steve Rogers- amazing freelance designer
Nicole Wakelin- just plain amazing
Action Flick Chick
Game Couch
Geek Girls Network
Geek With Curves
GeekBoy Presents
Geek Girl Diva
Geek Shui
Giant Fire Breathing Robot
Girls Are Geeks
Has Boobs Reads Comics
Naked Hobo
Pop Bunker
Reality Amuck
Rock The Lan
Shiny Lines (I NEED THE GEEKBREEDER MUG!!)
The Carnival of Random
Troll in the Corner

I’m sure I’m forgetting all kinds of love. I’m scatter brained right now pretty, pretty please forgive me!

One of the best feelings in the world is that which you get when something just fits. That comfy old T- shirt you’ve had for 10 years, hearing the perfect song on the radio that says everything going through your head at the time, snuggling in on the couch with the person that just gets you. A moment in time that makes you feel at home. That lil sigh with a dash of giddiness one feels when things just fit right freakin’ rocks.

It was the search for a place for my monkeys and I that would give us that feeling when we walked in that has lead to UberDork Café. It’s a giant quirky chunk of me. I once had a very good friend tell me that I “suffer from poor marketing.” He further explained that I call myself a dork, I look like a dork, but I’m so much more than that. He’s right. I am a great many different things. But, I am still totally a dork. And as I am always true to form, Uberdork Café is so much more than just the café of an UberDork. Getting to know UberDork Café is like getting to know me. So allow me to introduce you to us.

In essence, UberDork Cafe is Art + Science= Geek in a family-friendly environment that supports local vendors and artists, the earth and gives back to the community not only by providing a safe place for youth to play and learn, but also in financially assisting future Art + Science= Geeks.
I can see the “huh?” bubble over some of your heads, don’t worry, Imma break it down more for you.

Café- Yuppers there will be coffee, geeky baked goodness and a simple but delish menu. Complete with grown up “happy meals.” Which I will of course have to change the name of so Mc Donald’s doesn’t try to sue my lil ole self. But, us grown ups deserve toys too! Oh and of course plenty of snacky “gaming food.”
Family-Friendly- Having a kid’s menu, some crayons and high chairs doesn’t necessarily mean kid-friendly. The goal is to have them, have families, feel welcomed. The plan is to have an actual kid’s section. Optional of course. But, an area where kids can sit and eat and play. With a menu that is more than just chicken fingers and fries.
Supporting Local Vendors and Artists- While my motivation may have been my monkeys, it’s all about my community as well. The goal is to use as many local vendors as possible. To showcase local artists and talent as well. Whether it’s someone guest-teaching a class, hosting a local knitting group, a comic artist lecture or meet and greet or allowing local artists to exhibit and sell their works, there will be much opportunity to support the great vendors and artists that my community (both in location and in spirit) has to offer.

The Earth- UberDork Café will strive to be the greenest business it can be in every sense of the environmental term.

Safe Place to Play and Learn- Besides the café section, the other two parts that make up UberDork Café are a game room and a classroom. Play is an important part of life that we adults tend to lose sight of as we grow. One of my goals is to not only nurture that play but bring it back to those that have forgotten it. No matter what your controller of choice looks like, no matter how many sides your favorite die has, no matter how your board is shaped, UberDork Café will embrace and try to offer it. Come roll how you want to roll. Play how you want to play. And for those of you who may have forgotten, there will be classes. Art and science classes that families can take together, adults and kids may take alone and all will be adaptable to those with special needs. (Yup, I was once a special ed art teacher. Which is something not many people know. It was also one of the best jobs I’ve ever had.) And if you’ve been eying up a 360 but have never owned a console before, well we’ll give ya an intro to it. Always wanted to tackle DnD but were scared to be a noob? We’ll cover ya too.

Financially Assisting Future Art + Science = Geeks- I’m a giver. It’s just part of who I am and one of my favorite parts of my goal with UberDork Café is to help foster our future. Each year, UberDork Café will offer three scholarships. They may not be huge at first, but hopefully they will grow. The basic criteria to qualify for these scholarships are simple. 1. The student has to be from the inner city. The reasoning behind this is I want to support those that are often under-supported. Those that often get lost in the shuffle. Those that could use someone to look them in the eye and say “I believe in you.” b. The student must be going on to pursue further schooling in: Video Game Design/Development, Science and lastly a Geek Girl.

So welcome to UberDork Café and welcome to me. ☺

Now just when will we be able to hang out at the awesomeness that is UberDork Café? (hee hee)

Believe it or not, a lot of that depends on YOU. Yup, YOU. If you read my last blog, you will know that UberDork Café was selected as a Kickstarter Project. One that launches oh…. TODAY!!!!

The fun of Kickstarter is this- I get to promote my project any nonspammy way I can. The more awareness I get it, the more chance I have of people seeing it and thinking “Jinkies that sounds swell, lemme back it with $1, $10… etc.” And when people back the project, they can get fun UberDork Café stuffs for doing so.

What does that mean? What can I do?

I thought you’d never ask. >;-)

Simple answer- as much or as lil as you’d like.

This means you can go big by visiting The UberDork Cafe Kickstarter Project Page and backing it.

You can go medium by helping me spread the word by passing on the link via any way you’d like (email, twitter, facebook, airplane flown over baseball stadium with banner, racing carrier pigeons, etc.) Here’s the link: Http://www.tinyurl.com/UberDorkCafe

You can go small by following @UberDorkCafe and/or it’s lil home on Facebook.

Or you could go wild by shaking it up and trying various combinations of all of them. #geeksdorksandnerdsgonewild

As I write this I am a total ball of excitement and a terrified mess. This is my dream. And it’s possibly one GIANT step closer to becoming a reality. None of this would be possible without the support I have already received from some REALLY great people. People that get my vision, that get what UberDork Café is all about and are wonderful enough to believe in me. There are far too many to list here but there are two that CAN NOT go unmentioned. @CapSteveRogers and @GeekWithSoul. When I was at my wits end with being too close to this to come up with a logo, they stepped in and completely kicked ass. Both have come up with a variation of the logo that I will be using. One for larger scaled projects, one for smaller things where the lil graphic element of me will be lost. And I completely LOVE them. The logos and the guys behind them are beyond awesomesauce. Thank you and the giant tally of *huggles*tm they have coming there way don’t even begin to cover it.

Thank you all for believing in a café that is more than just the café of an UberDork and a gal that is more than just a dork with a dream.

*MWUAH!*

My monkeys are getting soft… and they’re taking me down with them.

The fact that my girls could quote Star Wars at two and three years old didn’t surprise any of my friends and family. The shocker was they did it wearing pink.

“I thought you hated pink.”

Pink does indeed make my right eye twitch in many of its applications. The only proven documented cases of me donning pink are my sister’s wedding from Hell (think pink meets Carmen Miranda) and medicinally. I have the distinct pleasure of being allergic to mosquitoes and yet living in a place that jokes they are the state bird. Thanks to those lil bloodsucking bastards and Calamine lotion, every summer I turn into a pale pink spotted leper. My theory on the whole pink thing with my daughters is this- just because I have issues with the color doesn’t mean I’m gonna impose my view or distaste of it on them. I want them to be their own lil people and if that means them liking pink, so be it.

Alright, look, I was totally hoping they’d take after me. They had me pretty convinced I was in the clear for a while here too. Pink was a passing phase. Purple, red and black have replaced it.

But I am far from out of the woods.

I know my name has girlie in it. True to form, I am quirky with my girlie-ness. People have been known to receive surprise packages of homemade daisy sugar cookies lovingly decorated with M&Ms. But, eldest’s last birthday cake request turned out to be a life size Yoda. Which I blissfully tackled creating new cuss words as I built him. I’m almost always seen wearing lipstick. Yet the makeup and hair product department scares the complete shit out of me. Last year I am proud to say I learned how to put on eye shadow for the first time. Figured one day I may need to teach the monkeys that. Hairspray, however, is still a complete mystery to me beyond a fixative for charcoal drawings and a make shift self-defense device. You never know when an Aqua Net flame-thrower may come in handy ya know. I’m girlie on some levels, others not so much.

I had a close call last year when my phone rang at 7:15am on Black Friday. Panic ensued when a woman who is like a sister to me uttered ”Look bitch, my nieces are getting Barbies this year and that’s that. Suck it up.” And they did. It was less than a week later I got the joy of calling her and saying “Guess what hooker- your youngest niece just popped the head off her Barbie and chucked it at her sister. And she did the same back. That’s right, Barbie head fight all up in here.” Whew.

Still not out of the woods.

Last week during our drive home, eldest monkey was talking like 93mph about her day. Then gasps. “Oh my gosh mommy, I totally forgot to tell you- J CALLED ME HIS BFF TODAY!!” My brain so hadn’t processed yet and before I knew it I was all “Oh my gosh that is like way awesome.” And then she was all “Do you know what a BFF is? “ And I was all “Duh, it’s totally Best Friends Forever.” And then she was all “Wow. Mommy you are like so totally awesomesauce.” Then a voice of logic from within bitchslapped my neurons back into place. WHAAAA?? She’s only 5! I had visions of a 13 year old having body snatched my kid. And me for that matter!!! That night we had a “Goonies” intervention. Had to be done.

But it started to sink in. She’s growing up. They are growing up. And being exposed to BFF’s and lip gloss. I know girls will be girls. The dresses and skirts don’t bother me at all. I can even live with the fake plastic my first hooker heel dress up shoes they clomp around in. Well, until I step on a stray one. Them suckers hurt. The first rock star they met in person wasn’t someone from a Disney show, it was Maynard from Tool & Puscifer. They don’t want ballet lessons, they want to go to “Kung Fu School.” It’s been balancing out, but I’m scared of the scale tipping. Too soon! Not ready. There’s not nearly enough saved up in the therapy fund yet.

And then there was this Wednesday night. What started out like a normal Monkey Family Movie Night, quickly downward spiraled. Alvin and the Chipmunks the Squeakquel was harmless the first time we watched it. This time, it changed. While Simon is still their favorite, my safe lil balance was thrown way off. Thanks to those lil Chimpettes. Monkey Family Movie Night turned into me learning the words to some “you’re hot and your cold…. you’re yes and you’re no” song and Beyonce’s “Single Ladies.” Not just the words, oh no, we went further down the rabbit hole than that. To sum it up, a knock on the door from the neighbor girls later and I had a room full of lil girls and somehow I was choreographing our own routines to the songs.

I am not ashamed to say I had fun. Their giggling is infectious. And it’s my favorite sound in the world.

But, I’m scared. I’m scared of that scale getting tipped long term to all that is pink and plastic and Barbie. To stereotypes and living up to peers’ expectations instead of being true to themselves and who they really want to be. They are my daughters though. I have faith they will settle into their own quirky girlie-nesses. Proud to be girls. Knowing that being soft doesn’t mean you aren’t strong. That having boobs doesn’t mean you don’t have brains. That life is a continual learning process and someday their daughters may teach them as they continue to teach me.

The next day eldest’s class went to the book fair they have going on at her school. She was given an envelope of money from me and told she could buy anything she wanted with that money. There was only one requirement- it had to be something SHE wanted. Not what she thought I would want, or her sister would want, or her BFF would want. What SHE wanted.

And this is what she came home with.

Obi-Wan, you are my hope.

So, I had me a lil moment on Twitter Friday morning. Ok, it was more like a Falling Down moment. I was Michael Douglas and I’d had enough. Now I know #twitterisalotlikehighschool, but my faith in humanity felt like it was being flipped off. And I snapped… just a touch.

You see, I logged in that morning and the number two trending topic was #getwellgaga. #Haiti was barely clinging to the bottom of the list. Admittedly, that was enough to bother me. Then I pulled up my faithful buddy Google to find out what exactly the well wishes were for. For a number two slot, I expected to find a diagnosis of cancer or, at the very least, a car accident or shot by a crazy stalker fan. I’d have MAYBE settled for a trip to rehab. Not that I’m wishing any of these on her. Instead I read “Lady Gaga cancels performance due to exhaustion.” You’re kidding me- right? Exhausted from cancer treatments? Exhausted from running from crazy knife/gun-wielding stalker fan? Exhausted from saving the world from certain doom? Jeebus give me something here!! Nope, just “exhausted.”

Over 3 MILLION people have just been severely affected in a nation that was already struggling with some pretty serious issues and people are more focused on sending get well wishes (that she’s never even going to see, let alone respond to!) to some goofy bitch that just needs to eat a sandwich and take a night off from partying?? Yeah, I went from bothered, squealed right on past pissed and landed firmly in Superfly TNT.

As I’d already blipped my morning love song to my coffee my second tweet of the day was:

“What the fuck kind of world do we live in that get well wishes for some obnoxious wannabe who is merely ‘exhausted’ out trends #haiti?!!??”

Followed by:

“Seriously. You know who is EXHAUSTED? The 3MILLION people affected by Tuesday’s quake and all the volunteers in #haiti trying to help.”

And I hit the ground running from there. I also refused to call Lady Gaga by her name as to avoid adding anything to the already trending hash tag. Then I went after the number one hash tag #OMGfacts. I kept it there so any of the people looking for their tweets may actually end up receiving a bit of education. I tweeted several facts regarding the issues facing those in Haiti. I am happy to report that MANY of my tweeps backed me. With comments, with RT’s, with DM’s, they supported my anger. My disappointment. My sadness.

I think people’s obsession with celebrity worship is disgusting. Believe me, I’ve met more than my fair share of celebrities and they are assholes just like the rest of us. In many cases, even worse. What have they truly done to earn such admiration and blind lust? What value does that worship truly add to one’s life? Actors and actresses may have done a performance that moved you. Ok, but that performance was written by someone else. That character is not THEM nor their creation. Furthermore, most of the time, that character isn’t even REAL. Musicians may be talented, but their music often isn’t written by them and they aren’t singing that song to you. Really, I hate to break it to you, but they aren’t. There are hundreds of thousands of wonderful, highly musically talented people in this world that will never be noticed. Are they just as worthy? Is it for the sole purpose of looks? There are beautiful people everywhere on this planet. Most of which are beautiful INSIDE AND out. Do they not beckon the same then? Don’t even get me started on the Paris Hiltons of this world. I think you’re getting my point.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not shunning all you fanboy and fangirls out there. I get digging a show, a character, a game, a movie and collecting stuff that goes along with it. Hell here in monkeyland we have a tank with a fish named Wonder Woman, a frog named Princess Leia and a snail named Chauncey The Wonder Snail. I’m not picking on you. Not at all my dearies. It’s the chicks that get the vapors and bawl for weeks on end because their favorite so and so is engaged. It’s the guys that wallpaper their room with posters of their favorite so and so and name their designated self love hand after them. It’s the people that all went suicidal when Michael Jackson died. It’s the people that take it to that whole other level. Like sending get well wishes to Lady freakin’ Googoo on Twitter.

< / rant>

Just like life, Twitter doth take away and it doth also give. While it flipped off my sense of humanity on Friday, this week it gave it a big ole wet smoochie. And it did so in #geekswithheart. Power to my geeks! Two of my absolute favoritest sexy ass sisters in geekhood @GeekGirls and @GeekyClean have come together to form Geeks With Heart, a fundraising effort to help Haiti. And yup, I just wanna hug ‘em.

All proceeds raised go to Mercy Corps. Mercy Corps mission: “Mercy Corps exists to alleviate suffering, poverty and oppression by helping people build secure, productive and just communities.” Their motto: “Be The Change.” I LOVE that! Just some of their efforts to help survivors in Haiti to recover include “ ‘Comfort for Kids,’ a trauma-counseling methodology for children that (they) co-developed and deployed after 9/11, Hurricane Katrina, the Sichuan Earthquake and other disasters.” Currently, they are “focused on immediate humanitarian needs: water and sanitation, trauma support and job creation.”

For those in doubt, while Geeks With Heart is small (for now!), Mercy Corps is big. This is what they do and they are good at it. They will know how to properly handle and disperse all funds raised to assure that they meet the greatest needs first. They’re pros y’all.

So, please, show some support. Show some geek love. Show some nongeek love. Just show the love. To do so…

Visit Geeks With Heart here.

Visit The Geek Girls Network here.

Visit Geeky Clean here.

Follow @geekgirls

Follow @geekyclean

Add a Twibbon here

Do me proud folks! This is the kind of moment I LIKE having!