I’m a “rather be alone for the right reasons than with someone for the wrong ones” kind of gal. That and the ex was/is an ASSHOLE of epic proportions. EPIC. So, not one single tiny atom of regret for putting the kibosh on the marriage. I did so knowing I may spend the rest of my life alone and I damn sure was going to be the sole parent in charge of the monkeys. For years, I’ve told everyone I am a crazy cat lady in training. I’ve got the two kitty spinster starter kit going now and I would be fab at it. In fact, my newest therapy in life is knitting, so they would be the most fashionably dressed 933 cats in the tricounty area. I’ve recently added my font whorishness to the mix and am planning on monogramming those bad boys each in a different font. And you doubted I’d be fab at it?

Well, a couple of months ago some of my posse, my peeps, my home skillets decided it was creepin’ them out and I “needed” to start dating. I don’t take well to being told what to do, even outta love. I can be quite the stubborn biotch. But, it did get me thinkin’… cats aren’t as fun to cuddle with and friends look at you weird when you try to make out with them. Ok, most of them. So, I succumbed. Got me a profile on a free dating site and oh the fresh hell that awaited me. I’ll be blogging them freak by freak in the future.

The one thing I still won’t cave on though is my profile. The horde of cupids on crack that I call my nearest and dearest insist it is too “weird.” My response continues to be- “If they can’t hang with my profile, they’re not going to be able to hang with me. Period. It’s ME. ” I lay it all on the line upfront. I know I have the trifecta kiss of dating death- 1.Single Mom 2. I’m a curvy girl. 3. I’m quirky as hell. But, it’s how I roll. Somewhere there is a man who is brave enough to ride the crazy coaster, complete with two extra cars. Who knows, he may be closer than I think. But if not… this girl has a backup plan……

MyProfile (that is such an utter abomination) that’s on the dating site:

I used to beat up the kids that picked on the “special students” during recess. Now I work with those with chronic mental illness.

I speak quite a few languages, enjoy coed naked underwater basket weaving, have an addiction to Sushi and humor is my defense mechanism.

Arrogant people make my right eye twitch.

Other than that, I’m just me.

Honestly though, I’m kind of a quirky girl. I’m ambidextrously brained, I will knit for tattoos, I am the friend that everyone comes to for advice and bail money. I pride myself on keeping my eyes, ears, heart and mind open. Making me laugh goes a long way with me, I think the brain is the sexiest organ and I’m the kinda gal you can take anywhere and I”ll have a good time. Now I just need a good partner in crime 😉

If you’re still reading this… woo hoo! Another thing that’s important to know about me- I’m a really honest person. What you see is what you get with me- I don’t play games. I honestly just don’t think I’m even wired to be able to. So, I’ll rip off the rest of the band aid for ya now..

1. I am a single mom. I know that’s a frightening thing for some guys and I understand why it would be. But, it’s what I am. I’m good at it too and my lil monkeys rock. They are way cool, tons of fun and sooo loving. So, yeah, a serious relationship with me eventually means a package deal. It’s a good package though 🙂

2. I’m a curvy girl. My hourglass comes with a ghetto booty at the moment. But, I work out frequently, eat healthy and am really active. While I am a bit of a work in progress so to speak, I’m also comfortable, confident and take pride in who I am.

If you’ve stuck it out this far, are thinkin’ “hmmm…I think I can hang with this..” and aren’t into the whole game thing… say hi. 🙂

Oh and not being psycho would be a HUGE plus 🙂