I have seen all that is wrong with this world and it drives a Mercedes SUV. Okay, that may be a bit overdramatic and I do not have a vendetta against everyone who drives a Mercedes SUV. You know what, screw the disclaimer, you’ll get what I mean. 🙂

Both monkeys are in school now. I love their school. I really do. The town it’s in leaves a lot to be desired. But, the school itself is awesome and it gives me hope. It’s a public school. On one of its walls is a sign “If a child can’t learn the way we teach, maybe we should teach the way they learn.- Ignacio Astrada” And so far they have followed it. That, my friends, is what gives me hope. But, that’s a whole other post.

It’s a relatively small elementary school and has a very small parking lot. For years now, the drop off and pick up are the same. To avoid blocking school buses and traffic on the road in front of it, you line up and snake around the rows. It’s a very, very simple process that makes a great deal of sense once you learn it.

Now, logical thing for a new person to do is pull straight in and right up to the front. They wouldn’t have noticed all the cars wrapped around and so I’m sure initially it is not meant to skip everyone in line. I give the benefit of the doubt for new faces. Always. There is, however, no mistaking the “oh shit” moment. When your “whoo hoo no wait!” moment passes and you realize all of the other cars are there and you just skipped them all. Again, people react differently when embarrassed and such, so if they don’t give the gratuitous ‘Aww snap, I’m sorry” wave and look of shame, no biggie. All I ask is that the lesson be learned.

I guess for some that is just way too much to ask. And THAT, my dears is why all that is wrong with this world drives a Mercedes SUV.

Monday morning she came whipping up just as I was at the front of the line. Didn’t even bother to look. She gets waived in to pull up, then I do. Life goes on.
Tuesday morning, the same thing. I’m at the front of the line and up comes whipping Ms. SUV. Okay. Hmmm… so, I get out when I park to unleash monkeys onto the school. I politely walk over to her, extend a hand and say “Hi! I’m Natali, (fill in monkey’s names) mom and lead room mom for (fill in monkeys’ teachers names).” No handshake. Just blank annoyed stare. I continue. “Okay, well, I know that pick up and drop off can be somewhat confusing here at (insert monkeys’ school name) for new parents so I thought I would…” She cuts me off “I’m not new. And you’re making me late, what is your point?” Me “Wow, well okay, I don’t want to make you late. I just wanted to politely inform err I guess remind you of the proper drop off and pick up procedure here.” She literally turns, gets in her vehicle and off she goes.

My eye twitched and I swear I heard the music played when the Wicked Witch, (or in the event my girls grow up and read this, the “Misunderstood Witch”) from the Wizard of Oz hops on her broomstick and flies off. Dee dee dee dee dee dee. Dee dee dee dee dee dee. Dee deeeee!

Wednesday morning, I get us out the door 5 minutes earlier hoping to just avoid the situation. Guess what happens? Yup. Just as I get to the front, up whips Ms. Mercedes. I throw my hands up in a “WTF?!” way. She turns and smirks. * eye twitch * I smile and wave. Yup, I smiled and waved. Bigger person. Deep breaths. More flies with honey. She continues to smirk as she pulls ahead of me and unloads her offspring. I open my window and say “Nice to see you again! Have a great day!” Inside though, the well of profanity can barely wait for me to shut my window and make it off of school property.

Now, I feel compelled to mention that there is a rotation of teachers out front in the morning and each day it was new ones so they really didn’t realize she wasn’t someone who was dropping off for the first time and just didn’t learn the process yet.

Thursday morning, off we go. I take a deep breath as pull up to the front of the wrap around. I look to the entrance to the parking lot and don’t see her. HUGE sigh of relief. The car on deck goes… I take my foot off the brake and just begin to move forward when in she comes- BARRELING toward us. I have to slam on the brakes.

NOW I’VE DONE HAD ENOUGH.

She unleashes the smirk. I raise the “Oh, this is how it’s gonna be biotch!?” eyebrow.

She pulls up and parks. I pull up and get out. Again. Deep breath, smile on face. Sugary sweet tone in voice. With just a hint of sarcasm. “Hiiiiiii. It’s me again. I didn’t catch your name the other day.” *BLANK STARE* “Anywho, I know that the whole concept of wrapping around in rows (*hand signals all kinds of stewardess-like indicating the proper flow of traffic*) can be REALLY difficult for some people to grasp. Driving is hard. But, I would be more than happy to make a little video for you demonstrating how not to drive like a maniac and endanger the youth at this elementary school. Especially my lovely daughters. Wave to the nice lady girls!” The girls wave. And, clearly my daughters, both at the same time say “Hiiii” the same way I did and “You have to wrap around. You can’t just skip ahead.” Me: “Oh look at that- a 5 and 7 year old get the concept. Kids these days are so advanced.”

Then she snaps. “I AM IMPORTANT! I HAVE SHIT TO DO! BACK THE FUCK OFF OF ME, LET ME DROP MY FUCKING KID OFF IN PEACE!!!” Yeah, the gasping of kids, other parents and teacher meant nothing to this woman. Kids in earshot covered their ears. Well, except mine. They just stood there smiling. A horde of angry parents (okay, it was 3, but that’s practically a horde here) emerged on her as did two teachers.

I kissed my girls. Told them the same thing I tell them every day “Have fun! Learn stuff! I love you the mostest much in the whole entire universe.” And I drove away. The other people can try to drive the lesson home to her.

It’s her “I AM IMPORTANT!” attitude that is what’s wrong. We are ALL important. No one person should be treated as more important than anyone else. No one person should be given privileges that they haven’t earned. It takes a freakin village. Not just to raise our future but to nurture this country. Parents that act like this teach their children that it’s okay. Now, I am FAR from the perfect parent and will be the first one to point out my many flaws. But, I try. You know what- the first time I went to pick up the girls, I didn’t know the system. I had my “oh snap!” moment and I apologized. Then I never did it again.

If some one can’t follow simple rules of drop off and pick up at an elementary school, I fear for our future. If people become so self absorbed they can’t take two minutes to hear and really listen to what someone has to say to them, I fear for our future.

The second I pulled out of that parking lot, I was reminded of that clip in Mr. Mom. If you don’t know the clip I’m talking about, please take a minute to watch the clip. 🙂

And it made me smile.

So, fellow peoples of the world, let’s get it together. Let’s remember to treat people with decency. Let’s remember we are all in this crazy thing called life together.

Let’s remember- south to pick up, north to drop off.

And let’s hope we don’t need to raise bail money for me if that woman cuts me off again. 🙂